She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
