I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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