Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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