i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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