Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize