So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
