are you still at the devil's house?
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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