HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
accomplished twins. life is a go
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
There was a lot of him and a little penis
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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