my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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