Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
