I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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