I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
he quoted the bible to break up with me
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Randomize
