i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
