It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize