So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Randomize
