the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
we're making bets on your personal life
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌