just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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