Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
