so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize
