so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
