I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
