doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
