It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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