He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
The ass gains better be worth it
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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