margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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