he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
did i walk over a car last night?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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