You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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