I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
