great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
he was CRYING into my vagina
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
