Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
