these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
