i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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