you traded sex for a burrito?
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
