was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
