I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
I love having hate sex.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
