Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
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