Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Randomize
