Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
The adults are the big ones right?
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
