Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Randomize
