He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
