dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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