We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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