Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
this just has baby written all over it
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
