There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
Randomize
