At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
Randomize