so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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