woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize