One girl and one boy is just not enough.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Randomize
