Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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