I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
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