help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
These 23 People Prove You Don’t Have To Be A 10 To Be Good In Bed
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
21 People That Had The Worst Birthdays Imaginable
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes