apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?